The Year of Intentional Living
I am making plans. Constantly.
When I wake up in the morning, one of my goals is to make three decisions or set three goals to accomplish during the upcoming day (or some combination of the two). And, yes, sometimes one of those decisions is, “What am I going to wear today?”
This morning ritual usually revolves around at least one work goal (i.e. “publish a blog post”), one personal goal (i.e. “write and send birthday cards”), and one family or household goal (i.e. “clean the bathroom” or “put clean laundry away”).
The average human adult makes 35,000 decisions in a day. Thirty-five thousand. No wonder I’m so tired.
In order to not get overwhelmed with having to make so many decisions, I plan and schedule and write to-do lists. We have three whiteboards in our kitchen for chores, the weekly schedule, and a shopping list. I am working to develop habits that help me accomplish these goals without having to think about it.
For example, I don’t spend time deciding whether or not to go to the gym. We have a fitness center where I work, and I put a daily workout on my Outlook calendar. When it pops up on my computer, I wrap up whatever I am doing, and go to the gym. I warm up on the treadmill, and then choose a Fitness Blender video to do, usually dictated by what part of my body is least sore. (I’m 49 now; something is always sore.)
My most inconsistent planning comes up around meal planning. Sometimes, I do a great job: plan the week’s meals, shop accordingly, write down the plan on the whiteboard, and execute on it. But this is also an area I absolutely burn out on. After a month or so of planning, shopping, and cooking, I let my frustrations catch up with me. My kids don’t always eat what I cook for whatever reason; I’m the ONLY one who cooks dinners for the family; I’m the one who creates the menus.
I tried a few shortcuts to help me be more consistent, but I don’t always follow through on those either. I’ve done meal delivery services, online weekly meal plans, falling back on a week’s worth of favorites (spaghetti and marinara, taco Tuesday, etc.). Thank goodness for online grocery shopping and delivery. Shopping online means I am not confronted with endless aisles of decisions. I know many people who like to go grocery shopping, and like having the option of making impulse purchases. I am not one of those people.
These rituals of goal-setting, habit building, and decision making are all about exerting control. And not in a “control freak” kind of way, but in an intention-setting way. Something Gretchen Rubin (yes, her again) wrote about at the end of her book The Happiness Project was, “Having a feeling of autonomy, of being about to choose what happens in your life or how you spend your time, is crucial [to happiness].”
I feel that very keenly these days. Whether it’s because I am older and wiser, or I recognize that so much is outside of my control, waking up and setting goals reduces my anxiety and boosts my focus. Living with intention makes me happy.
Do you have habits that help control the decisions you make?
