Raise Your Voice
More people need to speak out for trans kids.
Each day my child leaves my house — to go to school, to spend time with his romantic friend, to take a walk around the neighborhood — is a day that he may get hurt.
Sure, kids get hurt. They get stung by bees, or fall and skin their knees, or, god forfend, get in car accidents. Children are hurt and die every day in this country and around the world.
But this child of mine we are talking about is transgender, so in addition to the usual worries about my heart walking around outside of my body, I worry about the attitudes and actions of others.
In Oklahoma, Nex Benedict, a non-binary teenager, was beat up in a bathroom at school. They died the following day. One response from an Oklahoma politician basically amounted to, “Good. We don’t abide that type of filth (i.e. LGBTQ+ people) in this Christian state.”
I’ll let that sink in for a minute. A Republican politician, a member of the “pro-life” party, being not only fine with the violent death of a child, but using the word “filth” to describe some of his constituents. WTAF.
It’s not up to me
If it were up to me, everyone would leave trans children — trans people in general — alone to live their lives. In the case of trans kids, as well, people would trust supportive parents to do what they needed for their children. (And also give children with unsupportive parents a safe haven.)
I want my child to stay alive. I want my child to thrive. I want my child to have access to the care they need for their physical and mental well-being. I want politicians to trust me to make those decisions about my child’s healthcare.
But I want more. I want more people to speak up and advocate for children like mine. Whether or not they have children in the LGBTQ+ community or not, whether they have children at all.
I am tired of the loud voices from the right drowning out my voice. What about my “parental rights” to educate and care for my child in the way I think is best? I’m not trying to “make” your children trans, but I want the freedom to do what I feel is best for my child, which is help him be the most authentic version of himself. (Also, to learn accurate American history.) I want my children to have access to stories in which they not only can see themselves, but can see people different from them, children who are different, families that are different.
And I don’t want my voice to be alone in the fight for my kid. I want more than platitudes from the left, I want action, protection, and advocacy. I want healthcare plans that cover mental wellness and gender-affirming care for my family. I want options and a path forward for my children into their best lives, with knowledge, bodily autonomy, and opportunities.
So fuck Moms of Liberty and fuck LibsofTikTok. Let’s stop letting these small-minded, hateful groups make decisions about everyone’s kids. They don’t speak for me, and they don’t speak for what I want for not just my children — although maybe especially for my children — but for everyone’s children.
It can’t just be parents
Parents like me and like Nex Benedict’s mom can’t be the only people in this fight, either. We need institutions such as schools, media, and legislatures to start advocating for these children. Institutions need to start pushing back on the narrative that the far right is trying to establish. I know facts don’t matter to the people who are bigoted against our kids, but facts will reach people who are willing to be educated.
Be willing to be educated, and be willing to educate. You don’t have to have a kid in this fight to do the right thing. If it helps, ask me about my kid. Maybe getting to know him will help you. It will for sure enrich your life, because my kid is amazing.
